Dating younger guy 3 years
Dating this much younger man made me see that I'm ready and open for something real again. When talking about dating and relationship techniques, I will sometimes refer to those who are “beginners,” those who are at an “intermediate” level of skill, and those who are “advanced.” I’ve received some questions about this, and about how I’ve never clarified what these terms actually mean.Not only is that the way for it to grow, but also the only way you can truly get to experience the joy of real connection with another person. When two people are just in different places in their lives with regards to relationships, then it's just the way it is, and there is nothing you can do about it.This also relates to someone's issues or emotional blockages.Many people have blocks around emotional intimacy and commitment and are literally just not capable of it...and, again, that honestly has NOTHING to do with you. It doesn't matter how intense and magical the connection between the two of you is -- and you could be the most amazing, sexiest, coolest, smartest, funniest woman alive (and he may tell you that, and honestly mean it, but still not be able to show up for you the way you want) -- you can't do anything to change another person's emotional, mental or physical availability.Because the truth is, you can't build an authentic relationship if you're not authentically yourself.I have learned from these things that the only way -- I now believe -- to build a genuine relationship is to be in the moment and to be fully ourselves, without the constant fear about where it's going to go or if it's going to end.
And you have the power to decide whether or not the situation is acceptable for you and choose how long you want to hang around in it. I'm ready to make better choices again about who to share my (still open! This is the best thing I learned about myself from this experience, and the way that I really walked away changed.
through it, I had some very profound realizations about myself, love and dating. I decided to get into a relationship with him anyway.
And, not only was I super happy, it also proved to be one of the most drama-free, stress-free dating experiences I've had in years.
I realized that I chose to get involved because I knew I'd be OK when he and I did decide it was time to move on, because I've always been OK in the past.
Granted, some endings are more painful than others, but as I've gotten older and been involved in more relationships, I have learned that the ending is for a good reason, and that my life absolutely goes on -- usually with me having learned something about myself and taking with me new memories and experiences.
But, most importantly, I realized that I have learned from my life that the rewards of truly connecting with another person -- even if for a limited amount of time -- are always worth it. Don't spend your time worrying about where it's going.